Slather Me in Honey and Call Me a Fruitcake (a five-minute #freewrite)

“Well, slather me in honey and call me a fruitcake!”

“I don’t need to slather you in honey to call you a fruitcake, Joey,” I smirked. “Your fruitiness was evident long ago.”

“Well, just slather me in honey then.”


Joey wiggled his eyebrows and placed a hand on his hip, wiggling his butt back and forth almost as quick as his eyebrows sashayed across his forehead. “Why would you slather anyone in honey?” He winked and pranced away, leaving me and my mind boggled. There were plenty of reasons to slather someone in honey –most of them sexy– but with Joey, who the hell knew what was going on in that guy’s mind?


“Oh, good grief,” I groaned and hurried to a window before the better part of my mind could convince me otherwise, could convince me that I truly did not need to see whatever that smash was, or why Joey was hooting louder than a teenager staring at some large boobs.

Peeling back the curtain, I winced.

Bees. There were bees everywhere. And there was Joey… slathered in honey, covered in bees, surrounded by glass shards from the twenty odd honey jars he had just broken.

Slathered in honey, he had become lord of the bees.



It’s Day 464 of @mariannewest’s five-minute #freewrite! The prompt for today is — honey — and this is what I came up with before the eggtimer website went beep-beep at me.

You can find today’s challenge at the following link:

Hooray! Joey has made another appearance! 😀 Still need to pop him into an actual story one of these days. He’s so random though, it will be hard to form a plot around him. Unless he’s just a side character… hmm. I will work it out one day. Adventures With My Nonsensical Housemate? Living Life With a Maniac? How I Boarded the Crazy Train? Surviving Joey?

The image used for my header is a CC0 image courtesy of Pixabay.

Thanks for reading! 🙂



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